I’ve been thinking recently, can a positive, optimistic person still get upset and want to smack someone.
Say there is a situation when someone attacks you verbally.
- The best thing would be to just shrug it off and not let another person make you angry, because if they do, they start controlling you. You give them that key that they are going to use to turn the real you into something you don’t want to be – a hysterical monster as an extreme example.
To be honest, other person’s opinion should not ever shake your attitude and ruin your day, but what to do when you encounter such a situation?
- There is a saying in Russian, that sounds like this, “The dog barks, the wind blows and the caravan goes on “, which if I’m not mistaken comes from the old Arabic one. It means that one shouldn’t take offense or get upset if someone criticizes them but rise above all the criticism instead.
I feel like it’s a very good proverb to remind yourself when you feel like you are getting angry at someone for what they said or done, although at times it’s easier said than done.
- Another thing that helps me is that I remind myself that we are all different and the beauty is in diversity. Even when I encounter a situation or a person that I truly dislike, it makes me appreciate the ones that I do like a lot more, I think the opposites give you that balance that helps you see everything clearer.
- Everyone is subjective even if they say they aren’t because we filter the situations that arise through our life experiences, lessons that we’ve learnt, people we’ve met; we look at the events through our own prism. Certain things that are good for me could be bad for you and vice versa. I think even the world is subjective, with countries, governments, media, everything. Some find certain things right and some find the same things wrong.
- I also pity people that try to make you feel bad and lead you with them along that road of negativity because it means they are very sad, unhappy people. If you are happy you will not be yelling, offending, criticizing another. You are happy and you want all the other people to be happy as well.
Those negative people that try to invite you to their train of misery might have encountered people that treated them the same way they treat you and they haven’t seen or learnt anything better. Be more forgiving and understanding, it really helps.
I feel like the older I get the easier it is for me to control myself but I have to admit, at times when people are being jerks I just wanna smack them. I know it’s a long way to become as patient as Lama, but I’m happy to be on that road to self-improvement.